Yesterday, August 17, I was putting on my make-up, getting ready to go run some errands. I had it on the news because that’s the channel my mom had been watching. I wasn’t really paying much attention. Then, about 11:30 EST, they announced a vehicle had run into a crowd of people. I texted my parents right away. There wasn’t much information coming out, though. People were still walking around, maybe only three or four people were hit, maybe it wasn’t terrorism. I left my house.

I came back an hour or so later. One person confirmed dead. Thirty or so people injured. The death and injury toll kept rising though. I felt anger. I felt sad. I’ve walked those streets hundreds of times. That H&M on the corner of the start of La Rambla and Plaça Catalunya was a favorite of mine. I’ve eaten at a restaurant down there even though I didn’t want to because only guiris eat on La Rambla. I’ve strolled down the street, taking in the essence of Barcelona and enjoying the culture.

And now someone has attacked it.

To make matters worse, later that night, we saw a story about Cambrils. Five people were shot dead by the Mossos (Catalan police) with bomb belts after running over several people and killing one. I lived in Cambrils for six months back in 2015. It’s a quiet beachside town with no more than 35,000 people. In the summer, the tourists come to enjoy a quiet beach vacation.

And now someone has attacked it.

I have friends still over there. I asked some of my old students if they are ok. They are ok. But they are scared. Who wouldn’t be? I’m scared. I leave for Madrid in ten days and I don’t want to be worrying about terrorists when I should be enjoying it. That’s what they want, though. They want us to be scared. We can’t let them keep us down.

The next few months are going to be hard. Security is going to amp up. It’s going to be hard to ever walk down La Rambla and not feel a sadness. I was nine years old when my country was attacked and I learned we aren’t as safe as we think we are in our country. Now, my poor students in Tarragona are learning the same thing. They’re being told to stay at home and their festivals are being canceled.

The worst part is that most of these people were tourists. They were visiting another country on a vacation. Maybe some people had saved up for years to be able to travel to Barcelona and now it’s been ruined. I don’t want people to think bad things when they talk about my favorite city. I don’t want people to not feel safe to travel to my favorite city.

We can’t let them win. Tots som Catalunya.